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Personal Apologetics
by Christopher Cuddy
It’s snowing outside as I write this. My laptop computer is set up on the table in our family living room, and I’m watching the snowflakes gently cover the ground. My mind wanders back to this time last year, when I was sitting inside the dorm room of a small college nestled in the rural hills of western Pennsylvania. I was watching the snow come down then, too. The only difference is at that time my soul wasn’t at peace as it is now. No, in fact, I was down-

right distressed, for I was faced with a proposition which for so many years I had regarded as unthinkable: What if Roman Catholicism is true... and what if I have to [*shudder*] convert?

There’s a smile on my face as I reminisce about those times past. A lot has changed since then; I’ve changed a lot since then. In fact, I’d have to say that this has been the most eventful year of my life. God has really been working in, through, and (sometimes) in spite of me during these past few months. It’s funny how just when you think you’ve got God’s plan for your life all figured out, He sends another surprise your way.

 
 
It all began back when I first entered college as a typical freshman: eighteen and eager. I was a thoroughgoing Protestant, a hyper-Calvinist, and a vehement enemy of the Catholic Church. Protestant theology and philosophy had been my passion for years, and it was kind of a hobby of mine to “disprove” Catholic beliefs and practices. I had the deep conviction that the Catholic Church was the “whore of Babylon” and that the Pope was the anti-Christ. Funny how things change...

The college in which I enrolled was also Protestant and Calvinistic, and it was highly respected for its dual emphasis on academics and spiritual growth. I had wanted to attend this college ever since I was a young child, and it was the first and only school that I applied to upon graduating from high school. I had the deep sense that God was calling me there.

My first semester of college was different than I expected, however. While campus life was exciting, I found myself feeling surprisingly empty and ungratified. I had expected to find a dynamic environment full of students excited about theology and philosophy, but I was surprised to discover that I was more Calvinistic in my theology than most of the people I came in contact with. I found the classroom work to be boring and ungratifying, and I spent most of my time amongst the stacks in the library. Moreover, I was also shocked to discover that there were quite a few Catholics attending the college as well. They were the minority on campus, to be sure, but little did I know just how much of an influence they would have on me.

Thinking back through the various and mysterious ways God worked in my life and led me home to the Catholic Church, I have to say that there were two individuals who were vital in my conversion to Catholicism: Anne and Gabriel. Both were highly intelligent, and both were deeply committed to their Catholic faith. We all shared a lot in common: all three of us had been homeschooled, all three of us came from strong, conservative, Christian families; and all three of us had enrolled at the same college at the same time. In spite of these similarities, however, we had our differences--or, I should say, I had my differences: I was Presbyterian, and they were Catholic.
 
 
While my friendships with Anne and Gabriel were quite different, they were both instrumental in my coming home to the Church. Anne was ever the Catholic apologist. During the summer prior to her first semester at college, she had spent a great deal of time working her way through various resources dealing with Catholic theology and apologetics. She knew that attending a Protestant college would be challenging, and she spent a lot of time preparing for the objections she knew her classmates would raise. Her efforts were not in vain. When she arrived at college, she not only had a firm understanding of her Faith, but she was also ready to defend it with a wonderful mixture of charity and charm. Anne’s grasp of her Faith blew my mind. Never before had I met a Catholic young person who was: 1) committed to her Faith, and 2) able to defend it! It was absolutely incredible. I can count on one hand all of the Catholics I knew growing up, and none of them had any idea why they were Catholic. The very fact that Anne could give me the scriptural basis for her beliefs in the real presence of Christ in the Eucharist, the perpetual virginity of Mary, purgatory, praying to the Saints, and a host of other issues was amazing. Anne was the first person who took the time to show me that the Catholic Faith was a Biblical Faith. I had always assumed that Catholics were committed to “tradition” at the expense of the Bible, and Anne showed me how deeply wrong I was!

Gabriel was also instrumental in my conversion. Gabriel was blessed with an extremely gifted mathematical mind, and I was deeply impressed by his commitment to logic. I had always assumed that Catholics would readily admit that their Faith contradicted the Scriptures, but Gabriel showed me otherwise. We spent many hours together, pouring through various portions of the Bible, trying to make sense of difficult texts. He was very insightful, and he was often able to shed valuable light on many of the confusing passages we were studying. Beyond Bible study, however, Gabriel also had a strong personal influence on me. We became close friends, and it was really through our friendship that I was able to see how a committed Catholic guy lived his faith. The way Gabriel lived his life--as a Catholic--had a profound influence upon me. He was the first person to explain to me how and why Catholics pray the rosary and ask Mary for her intercession. He was the first person to explain to me what confession was like, and how spiritually soothing and peaceful one felt after receiving absolution. He also shared the experiences he’s had while visiting Rome, and what it was like to see the Pope. We spent many late nights just sharing thoughts, dreams, feelings, and secret desires. He was (and remains) a truly wonderful friend.

 
 
A lot went into my conversion to Catholicism--I did a lot of reading, I listened to a lot of tapes, I talked to a lot of people, I offered up a lot of prayers--but in the end there is no doubt in my mind that the whole grace-filled journey began with Anne and Gabriel--with their love, and with their friendship. It brings tears to my eyes to think of just how unworthy I was to be able to call them my friends, and to experience our first semester of college together. When I did come into the Church--that following Easter--Gabriel was my sponsor; and there has never been a time in my life when I’ve felt closer to any friend than when Gabriel and I both stood before a watching congregation as I publicly professed my commitment to Christ’s One, Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic Church. It was a truly wonderful and blessed moment that I shall never forget.

If I could offer one piece of practical advice to today’s Catholic young people who seek to share their Faith with others, it would be this: truly love your neighbors. Sure, apologetics is important--having a firm grasp of our Catholic beliefs is absolutely essential to being a good Catholic witness. But more important than having all the right answers to the objections is having the right heart for the objector. In Galatians 5:6 Saint Paul speaks of the importance of a faith that works through love, and we really need to hold on to this verse when we go out and seek to evangelize. Anne and Gabriel were true, loving friends. Never for a moment did I get the feeling that they looked upon the times we spent together as opportunities to disprove my Protestantism or to lure me into the Catholic Church. They never pressured me into converting. Quite the contrary: theirs was a very genuine, sincere, and patient friendship.

May we be given the grace to go and do likewise. •
 
 
Christopher Cuddy is a member of the NextWave Faithful™ Apologetics Team, a student at Franciscan University of Steubenville, and a Research Assistant for Dr. Scott Hahn at the St. Paul Center for Biblical Studies. Check out his Christian Worldview Blog HERE.
 
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EWTN, Global Catholic Network
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